Swipe Swipe Swipe. Newly single, Daphne was on Tinder date number 2.

There was Peter. Dark eyes, lashes, bushy brow, big lips, salt and pepper hair. Peter was in film. In person, though he was just as handsome as in his pictures, he was an idiot who slurred dirty greasy words.

Peter’s jaw angled towards her, jutting out as if to eat her.

She felt like food. He was already chewing air.

Uncomfortable in his skin, ants in his pants in slow motion he professed,

“I hate my mother”

“My sister is a suburban whoooore”, as he juggled an invisible ball with his tongue.

“Did his tongue not know how to move?”

Daphne cocked her head in attempt to read this character, while she disregarded his muffled verbal drool that oozed into her lap. The link was weak between his thoughts and articulation.

“I like to slap women in bed”, as his lips smoooooshed together. His eyes pushed her mind to the back wall.

At the bar, angled towards him, Daphne smiled, nodded and laughed as she imagined him practicing kissing inanimate objects: his own hand, an apple, the bar that had traces of the nights conversations, the brushed concrete floor, the cold window facing the street, the restroom door, and animate ones: the girl behind his back, the bartender with the handlebar moustache, and himself. When left her alone to go to the washroom she imagined him making out with the mirror and leaving behind a trail as if he were a snail.

He, on the other hand, imagined she was wet.

Caressing her thigh through the fabric, kneading it, she retreated into her bones.

“You look so sexy in that jumpsuit. I’ll walk you home”.

“No thank you, said her soul”,

but her body couldn’t find, fast enough the word “no” buried deep in her in the folds of her cortex. All she spoke was the remaining

thank you”.

When he kissed her at her door, she thought he was acting, how to kiss, trying to be rough and tough and aggressive and strong. Daphne’s skin accepted the motions and watched him from outside herself.


Daphne closed the door, brushed her teeth, her tongue and showered under hot water until her skin burned.